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13. Many clients fight about problems rather than resolving them. To become more effective problem solvers, clients are encouraged to: |
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Accept blame for most of their relational problems, let their partners be in control for a change, and accept the hurtful things said by their partners because they are probably true.
Avoid blame, unless their partners are blameworthy; avoid controlling behavior, unless they are sure what their partners should do; and avoid hurtful statements, unless they are acting in self-defense.
Avoid blame, even when their partners are blameworthy; avoid controlling behavior, even when they know what their partners should do; and avoid hurtful statements, even when their partners have it coming.
Accept blaming, controlling, and hurtful verbalizations as a fact of life, and do not get all worked up about it.
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